A lot of times I find I just have to put down my sword and walk away. I don’t know if that’s the best way to go about things, but I’m human and can only keep up the fight so long before I need a break. The last few months it seems like the battle is on every front: physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, marital, financial, and on and on the list goes. I do the work, the research, the therapies, the damage control, and the praying, always, always praying. Then I’m completely burnt out, and I just walk from it all. God has been faithful and always reminds me it’s not over and brings me back, but I do wish I didn’t always follow such an extreme up and down pattern.
I did nothing since Thursday and it was wonderful. I think God knew I needed some snow days (sorry, everyone!). The kids got some extra movies, I got in a nap since Nate was home from work, and all I worried about what was we were going to eat. By the way, I do not recommend giving up doing dishes in a house that feeds 5 people. I’m still dealing with that fall out.
But yesterday, our pastor preached on Benaiah, King David’s warrior who killed a lion in a pit on a snowy day, and that was the call to come back to work. The kids are not better, in fact, they seem to be getting worse. But God is good and providing what I need when I need it, and I trust I’m going to see Him move for us again.