God has been working in me, and I’ve been praying more. It’s been a rough week with all the kids being sick and then Michael’s behavioral fallout from that. It’s good to know I can turn to Him first, and my attitude is slowly starting to change.
I’ve noticed though that while I’m praying more and it’s a good start, the prayers are for my own comfort, requests to make my life easier. And while I don’t think God wants to make my life difficult just for the sake of it being hard, I’m not convinced my heart is in the right place yet. I feel like the disciples all over again, asking Jesus to teach me how to pray! I want to know what God’s will is for my life so I can effectively pray it into existence.
I was reading Colossians this week. There are a lot of gentle reminders in there to serve the Lord and others with humility and love (something I needed when I just didn’t want to care for sick children anymore). But hidden in chapter 1 was this nugget:
Colossians 1:9-10 “For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; that you may have a walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God”
This is my prayer now. I want my heart to be aligned with God’s so well that I will pray what He wants me to pray. I want to see Him move miraculously so that there is no doubt in anyone’s mind who the credit goes to. I want to live a life that glorifies the Lord.